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7.09.2004

The Dog Ate My Homework

"President" Smirky McClusterfuck's military record has inconveniently vanished in what is certainly a non-Orwellian non-rewriting of history.

HOUSTON, July 8 - Military records that could help establish President Bush's whereabouts during his disputed service in the Texas Air National Guard more than 30 years ago have been inadvertently destroyed, according to the Pentagon.

It said the payroll records of "numerous service members," including former First Lt. Bush, had been ruined in 1996 and 1997 by the Defense Finance and Accounting Service during a project to salvage deteriorating microfilm. No back-up paper copies could be found, it added in notices dated June 25.

The destroyed records cover three months of a period in 1972 and 1973 when Mr. Bush's claims of service in Alabama are in question.

Shocking. Absolutely shocking. I just can't believe this happened. I bet BushCo is furious at whatever fortuitous incompetence led to the permanent loss of "President" Tipsy's record of heroic non-AWOL service to his country.

It's really a tragedy. Now all those anti-Murkan lib'rul ter'rists will think the worst and blame it on some conspiracy, rather than be proved wrong in their vicious lies about Murka's great leader!